Doctors are nuts!! and we are DONE!

So if you know me and my family personal then you know we have been experiencing what seems to be a swarm of medical issues. First let me start with our son, Raymond. He has a slight allergy to milk protein, what I mean by slight is that he can have sensitive milk based formula(had to switch from breastfeeding cause a no dairy/no soy diet killed me!)BUT he cannot have foods with multiple dairy products in it or when i was breastfeeding I couldnt have MILK! So naturally I switched to what I thought was the only alternative: Soy Milk. WRONG! He had a worse reaction to that! So anyways he is now 7 months old and hates drinking his formula. He has always cried while he drank a bottle but at least he doesnt have the rash and goppy eyes anymore. Or the INTENSE crying fits he had before when I was breastfeeding or when we tried regular formula. So with their being no other affordable source of formula without soy or dairy in it, I have decided to mix rice milk into his formula bottles to help him. Since he can tolerate dairy in small doses. I started him at about 4ish today and OMG he is a different baby. He ate 3 8oz bottles from then until 11pm tonight. usually im lucky to get him to drink that in a whole 24 hours. He actually pulled his bottle back in his mouth to eat if i took it out of his mouth AND hardly any crying at all. Now I did read that rice milk is not very nutritional which is why Im only mixing it in with his formula which has plenty of nutrients in it. When he turns a year old I will be mixing it with toddler formula and giving him calcium and vitamin D from other foods. Then he will be on vitamins if needed. I do not want to try to switch him to cows milk until he is older. If he likes it then fine. If not then NO harm done. We are the only species who WILLINGLY drinks another animals MILK! EWW lol....Dont get me wrong I personally love the taste of milk over rice milk or soy BUT i understand why my sons tummy cannot handle it. We werent necessarily supposed to. So until further notice rice milk/formula bottles for my darling angel!
On to my medical problem! At my post partum check up in Oct I was an idiot and got the depo shot. I didnt think I could remember pills after having 2 kids. Since I had a drug free natural delivery I had NO PLAN ON EVER HAVING MORE CHILDREN. Thank God, He has changed my mind on that one! Any hoo! I bled from having raymond up until a few days before my post partum appointment then started spotting the day of and then proceeded to bleed continuously til Feb 13th of this year. I decided NOT to get another shot of depo when it was due in January. I didnt have a period but did spot in march then started a HEAVY period April 9th that is still going. I went to the hospital, they said there was nothing they could do but put me BACK on birth control! OMG ARE YOU SERIOUS?! Cure a birth control related problem with BIRTH CONTROL!?!?! IDIOTS! Well almost 2 weeks later and HELLO still bleeding and still having CLOTS. So! Last night I was fed up after having another larger than quarter sized clot. I googled (yes i google my medical problems lol) depo and endometriosis as i am suspected to have it due to family medical history and my own symptoms. I found awful awful stories that women have posted about their experience with depo. So many stories like mine and even worse which I couldnt hardly imagine going through worse! When I looked up endometriosis I found that my symptoms could also be that BUT most likely depo. So I looked up herbal remedies for endometriosis and found this! "Red raspberry reduces bleeding and is thought to strengthen the uterus—herbalists and midwives have been using it for these purposes for at least a thousand years." AND "Horsetail also reduces excessive bleeding, especially menstrual bleeding. And it may do more than that for women with endometriosis—herbalists believe that it keeps scar tissue flexible, thus preventing further scarring. During the tuberculosis outbreaks of the early twentieth century,horsetail was used to reduce the amount of scarring on people's lungs. Pills containing horsetail are commonly sold to strengthen nails and hair, and may also strengthen connective ligaments such as those that hold the uterus in place."
FOUND HERE
So I went to Sprouts (our chain farmers market/organic store) and bought Red Raspberry capsules and Horsetail capsules. I took them when I got home and a second dose of horstail before coming up for bed. I can tell you that I feel much better already. My bleeding has so far slowed down more than I expected in such a short hours of taking these herbs. I am so glad I decided to look for herbal remedies.
On to hubby's case. Hubby has been having spouts of dizziness and migraines and some digestion problems. He works construction so on Monday when he told me he got so dizzy he almost fell off of a 20' platform I demanded he see a doctor. He is covered at the VA hospital (being a marine veteran and all yay!) so we went there. And well...they told him he just had some "digestive problems" im trying to be discreet with hubbys medical problems. They totally ignored the headaches and dizzy spells. He drinks plenty of water! Eats well! So he should NOT be having these symptoms. So today I look up herbal rememdies for dizziness and find peppermint oil pills to help and also chamomile tea. So I bought both at Sprouts as well. He took a peppermint pill before bed but idk how well it worked but he did fall asleep shortly after lol. He said it sucked though cause he was burping up peppermint lol but is definately worth it if he isnt dizzy.
WITH ALL THIS SAID! We are NOT trusting doctors! They have put me and my family through so many heartaches with all their mumbo jumbo and wanting to push pills down our throats or just NOT do anything at all and blame it on bowl movements!!!! So from now on I plan to treat our problems herbally (kids will still go for checkups but doc advise will be very very carefully thought about before following).
Some may call me crazy and say that certain people react certain ways and to just let my body work it out and so on. But if I would have left my body to God in the first place I wouldnt be where I am now. So Im going to use the resources our wonderful Lord has provided and fix what me and the idiot doctors have done. If you would like any info about herbs or natural remedies or where to find herbs I have some great links! Just contact me and I will be happy to share! Have a good night!

Monday is here...again

I saw a friends profile this morning and for her mood she put "case of the mondays". Hmmm What exactly does that mean? Well, after a nice weekend people are not always ready to go back to work. They are unmotivated, undetermined, and just plain BLAH! BUT as housewives we can not let ourselves get a "case of the mondays." We know what Monday entails we greet it every week. To keep yourself from feeling overwhelmed at the beginning of the week ease yourself into the housework. Dont try to get everything accomplished in one day. Just tackle the worst area today. Which is usually the kitchen or living room. Surprisingly enough we do not have a bad area this week, people picked up after themselves quite well this weekend. WaHOOOOO!
Dont forget to keep on top of your 6 month goals. Look over them every morning. Dont beat yourself up if you do not accomplish every goal in everyday. They are 6 month goals for a reason. It will take a while to establish them as habits.
So lets get washed, dressed, and primped and get to our chores, kids, and work(if you work at home). Have a great progressive day!

First Week of 6 Month Goals

So how did it go? Did you get a good start on your goals? What ones have you started on?
Here are mine...

• Read Daily Bible Reading EVERY morning.
  
• Pray the Rosary EVERY day.
• Wake up by 8am at the latest and go to bed by 11pm.
• Read the Bible to Daven EVERY day.
  
• Work on my appearance, be dressed, washed, and primped every day!
• Have a gentle peaceful attitude to my husband, children, friends and family.
• Lose 5lbs by doing the Wii Fit for 15 minutes every day.
• Make my husbands lunch every night before bed.

I have been doing my best to do my daily bible reading every day. I only missed on the day I lost control of my emotions. I have only woke up passed 8 ONCE this week yay! But I have been late on my bedtime for various reasons. But their is always next week. I did read daven's bible to him 2x this week. I am doing better with getting up and getting washed, dressed, and primped. The peaceful attitude is hard to have ALL the time but with God's help it will be easier. I however have not made the time for the Wii or any type of work out yet this week OR get hubby's lunch for him :( BUT I do have 6 months to work on these goals and to make them a habit :D I hope your week went well.

Want to freshen up your home?

My friend KC has some wonderful tips posted on her blog that are natural! Go check it out!
The Casey Castle

Earth day and more

Well I am up and at it today. I woke up at 8:15, so that was a bummer but Im still up! Brewing coffee right now while the boys watch cartoons. Daven has decided he wants two breakfasts so he is eating cereal and then I am making egg and sausage burritos. Today my plan is to just get some clutter and trash control done in my room and bathroom and then play with the boys outside since it is Earth Day. I challenge you ladies to also put down the cleaning gloves and cleaning supplies and go outside with the kiddos! It is a beautiful day that God has made and we should enjoy the Earth he gave us. Have a wonderful day!

Wow am I embarrassed!

So I lost control of my emotions today. I wanted to share this to let you all know that no one is ever perfect. Especially with two young children at home!
I woke up at 7:50am YAY. But much to my surprise hubby had texted me to tell me that he had locked his keys in the car while at a training class for a job! I should have stopped and prayed and trusted God. I have to admit that was not how I actually handled the situation. Instead, I lashed out! Yelling at the phone, browsing the internet for any quick fix, and texting everyone I knew hoping they had a solution. I asked everyone but God for help. If I just would have went to him first my day and my family's day would have went much smoother. Everything started to snowball after this, Raymond was fussy cause mommy was, Daven was short tempered cause mommy was, no housework or schoolwork got done. On top of all of this I was unable to make a doctor's appointment. *That is another story all in itself!* Although I let myself lose control and didnt seek God for help first. I did end up having a good evening once I let myself calm down. Thankfully tomorrow is a new day and God is a merciful God and will forgive me for my mistakes and short temper. I will do better tomorrow, I will keep my temper, I will complete my necessary responsibilities, and I WILL NOT take any anger out on my family.

My day went completely unexpected

I have been having some personal health problems and today I was told when I called to make an appointment for them that they wouldnt do anything but send me to the hospital. So today I went to the hospital scared and worried out of my mind. They only took blood and urine, no other tests and those looked fine so they sent me home and told me to follow up with my doctor...So basically they did a whole lot of nothing. So the next few days Im resting and then back to my normal routine if my body can handle it. Thanks for listening I hope if anyone decided to start their 6 month goals that your day went better than mine.

Dressed, Washed, Primped, and Ready for the Day!

Got up successfully at 7:50am! Woohoo! Fed Raymond, read daily bible reading on www.catholic.org , checked groups and to do list, fed raymond breakfast baby food, got a cup of coffee, washed up, put on perfume and lotion, got dressed, and now getting ready to start breakfast for daven as he just woke up! I will post pictures and an update this afternoon after everything is done. My normal goal is to get all my housework done before hubby gets home. Which gives me about 5 hours. Ready, set, GO!

Davens Lessons: Letter "L"

My oldest son Daven is 4 years old and I am homeschooling him for preschool. We do a letter a week and after a few letters we will have a review week to make sure he has those letters down before we move on. I got this nifty and colorful preschool workbook at Target (I will find the link for you tomorrow) and it works absolutely perfect for him and I. There are different sections in the workbook; mazes, letters, numbers, colors, same/different, sounds, and shapes. So we do one from all the sections except letters and numbers a day. We do one letter and number a week. I think this week is number 6 in this workbook. I also print out worksheets online for him to do with the letter of the week. I am also trying to get into a routine of reading his bible with him everyday during school time. Also this week I want to start teaching him to pray the "Our Father". We attend catholic mass so I am going to try to work on him memorizing the parts that we recite during mass as well as teach him to pray the Rosary and Divine Mercy. So tomorrow I will be introducing the letter "L" (oh we also do signs for every letter: sign language) as well as working on his other skills and teaching him the first 2 lines of the "Our Father" and we will be reading a story about Jesus tomorrow from his bible. We will also be playing in the pool for our P.E. I will try to post pics and links of what we do for school everyday :D

Tomorrow is a BRAND NEW DAY!

Had a good relaxing Sunday today. Woke up and went to mass together. Came home and ate lunch together, started laundry, and headed off for naps. Then we ate assorted dinners, lol grocery day tomorrow. Laundry is almost done and its almost bedtime. I want to get to sleep by 11pm and then up at the latest 8am. I would love to eventually be getting up between 6 and 7am but its best to start with baby steps. Remember tomorrow will start the new goals. If you would like to join me in this please comment with your 6 month goals and we will start together tomorrow. But tonight enjoy relaxing and enjoy your family. Tomorrow is a new day!

Divine Mercy Sunday

My daughter, tell the whole world about My inconceivable mercy. I desire
that the Feast of Mercy be a refuge and shelter for all souls, and especially for
poor sinners. On that day the very depths of My tender mercy are open. I
pour out a whole ocean of graces upon those souls who approach the fount of
My mercy. The soul that will go to Confession and receive Holy Communion
shall obtain complete forgiveness of sins and punishment. On that day all the
divine floodgates through which graces flow are opened. Let no soul fear to
draw near to Me, even though its sins be as scarlet. My mercy is so great that
no mind, be it of man or of angel, will be able to fathom it throughout all
eternity. Everything that exists has come forth from the very depths of My
most tender mercy. Every soul in its relation to Me will contemplate My love
and mercy throughout eternity. The Feast of Mercy emerged from My very
depths of tenderness. It is My desire that it be solemnly celebrated on the first
Sunday after Easter. Mankind will not have peace until it turns to the Fount
of My Mercy.
(Diary of St. Faustina Kowalska, # 699)

(a) Essential Celebration
The essential celebration of Divine Mercy Sunday consists in the celebration of the
liturgy of the Second Sunday of Easter, during which the homily should focus on the scriptural
readings of the day. It should be noted that the three cycles of scriptural readings and liturgical
prayers are all centered on the forgiveness of sins and God’s infinite mercy, which endures
forever.
In addition, it is necessary that the day publicly be called by its proper name, “Divine
Mercy Sunday.” The Decree of the Congregation for Divine Worship and the Discipline of the
Sacraments of May 5, 2000, which added this title to the Second Sunday of Easter, did not intend
to leave this as an optional title. The Latin of the original decree literally states that “in the
Roman Missal, after the title ‘Second Sunday of Easter,’ there shall henceforth be added the
appellation ‘that is, Divine Mercy Sunday.’ ” Unfortunately, the English version in official use
translates the phrase ambiguously: “or Divine Mercy Sunday.” But the Latin is clear: “seu,” in
other words, “namely,” or “that is.” Moreover, this was the Holy Father’s intention in granting
this title to the Octave Day of Easter; it is clear from his own public announcement during the
homily for St. Faustina’s canonization, when he stated: “It is important then that we accept the
whole message that comes to us from the word of God on this Second Sunday of Easter, which
from now on throughout the Church will be called ‘Divine Mercy Sunday.’ ” In his Regina Caeli
address on Divine Mercy Sunday, 2001, the Holy Father thanked God that he was able “to
proclaim the Second Sunday of Easter as the feast of Divine Mercy for the entire Church.”
(b) Enhanced Celebration
It is highly recommended that bishops and pastors:
· Arrange for special diocesan and parish celebrations of Divine Mercy Sunday.
· Invite participation in the special celebrations of Divine Mercy Sunday through diocesan
publications, parish bulletins and mass media.
· Encourage parishes and schools to obtain and make available Divine Mercy video and
audio tapes and literature related to the Divine Mercy. A variety of such materials are
available from the Marian Helpers Center, telephone: 800-462-7426.
· Encourage the practice of Corporal and Spiritual Works of Mercy as a way of life.
Celebrations of Divine Mercy Sunday may be as varied as the individuals planning them.
For example:
1. An afternoon celebration of Holy Eucharist, with an appropriate homily, ending with
the praying of the Divine Mercy Chaplet at the Hour of Great Mercy.
2. A Divine Mercy Holy Hour with Exposition and Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament,
a homily, the praying of the Divine Mercy Chaplet, and ending with Benediction during the Hour
of Great Mercy, 3:00 o’clock in the afternoon.
3. Veneration of the Divine Mercy Image with a procession, appropriate hymns and The
Divine Mercy Chaplet, followed by a blessing with the Image.

My Goals for the next 6 months

So I am up late and reading on cafemom. I know I should be sleeping but here I am. After looking at my Christian Homakers Group I am face to face with who I really am. I am not the wife I long to be and pretty far from it. I know I dont need to be perfect, just better. So I am going to list goals to accomplish and be Routine 6 months from now! On October 19th, 2009 I will post about how I accomplished my goals and then post NEW goals for the next 6 months. Feel free to join me and make your own list of goals. Do not let your list exceed 12 goals. This will give you 2 goals a month to reach.

• Read Daily Bible Reading EVERY morning.
• Pray the Rosary EVERY day.
• Wake up by 8am at the latest and go to bed by 11pm.
• Read the Bible to Daven EVERY day.
  
• Work on my appearance, be dressed, washed, and primped every day!
• Have a gentle peaceful attitude to my husband, children, friends and family.
• Lose 5lbs by doing the Wii Fit for 15 minutes every day.
• Make my husbands lunch every night before bed.

There ya go! There is my list of goals. They are going to be difficult and rough for sure. But by Gods grace I will accomplish them. I was thinking about picking 2 that I would accomplish each month. But I would like to work on working towards all of them everyday. They all are things that NEED to change!
Philippians 4:13---I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!

Some new thoughts...

After reading many other blogs I have realized I need to make mine more useful and personal. I love the ideas I have posted but they are not MY ideas. I am going to work on making this a better blog. I hope you will enjoy!

My Evening Routine

I pretty much have an evening routine already, but I do want to make it more orderly.

1. Put Raymond to sleep.
2. Run dishwasher
3. Get night time bottles ready
4. Wash face/brush teeth
5. Post next days to-do list
6. Work
7. Sleep @ 11pm

Putting an evening routine together can be easy but following it could be harder than a morning routine. As with everything a homemaker does, its going to take discipline. Good luck :)

Making Your Home a Haven: Evening Routine

Tammy's Kitchen | Homemaking

(photo by A Source of Joy!)

Thanks for joining me for this week's Making Your Home a Haven challenge! :)

Last week I encouraged everyone (including myself!) to choose love and joy during those moments when we're tempted to be grumpy and unpleasant. This is truly a challenge that never goes away. I know I'm still in need of a lot more practice!

My week didn't go how I had planned and I'm humbled to report that today I realise even moreso how far I have yet to go in this area. Thank you for your encouraging blog posts and comments -- you are truly a blessing to me!

Okay, so, we've written down our morning routines. Have you revised yours yet? I have! There's certainly nothing wrong with making changes and adaptations as we figure out what works best in each of life's many seasons! :)

I've found that my initial morning routine was too huge for me to tackle with success every day, so I pared it down to the 5 things that will help boost my morning and inspire me to keep going, rather than bogging me down and taking the entire morning to complete.

My revised Morning Routine:

1. Make tea/take vitamins
2. Bible time with children
3. Make (put away) bed
4. Put away clean dishes
5. Breakfast (hot cereal)

This simpler morning routine is helping to energize me in the mornings. Instead of doing a larger project (like school time) and not getting our bed made until mid-afternoon, I'm getting the easier pick-me-up stuff out of the way first.

How are you doing with your bed time? I am making it about 50% of the time. I am working on successfully streamlining a few more things in order to have more time for sleep. I'm hoping to have a good progress report in this area by next week! :)

This week's challenge is to implement an Evening Routine!

Your evening routine can consist of five (or fewer) things that you can do each evening to help give you (and your home!) a better start the following day. Sometimes the extra 5 minutes spent planning ahead for the next day is all it takes to make your home more of a haven. :)

My Evening Routine

1. Plan tomorrow's meals
2. Write a reasonable to-do list for tomorrow
3. Clean up kitchen
4. Bible time with Joshua
5. Shower

Taken from

New Routine??

So usually I wake up when my youngest Raymond wakes up but lately he wakes up between 8-9am. Which usually would not be a problem, but I am trying to accomplish more housework in a day and make wholesome meals but I feel like I dont have enough hours. Therefor I am going to try to start getting up earlier. Keyword being TRY! lmao...I am going to aim for 8am since he has been waking up at 9am lately then after a week of that I am going to start trying for 730am and then eventually 7am. I really have never been a morning person so I am not quite sure if I can do earlier than 7am unless I need to get up with hubby before he heads off to work. So tonight I am setting my alarm for 8am. Wish me luck! And now that I am late for my bedtime, I am off to bed!

Making Your Home a Haven

Making Your Home a Haven: Choosing Love

Tammy's Kitchen | Homemaking

(photo by A Source of Joy!)

Last Monday I challenged you to set a bedtime and follow it. How did you do? I did better this past week but I wasn't as disciplined as I had planned to be. I'm thankful for a new week and a new chance to keep working in the area of getting to bed on time! :)

It can be difficult to find that happy balance in life sometimes. You know? My life rarely seems as though it's perfectly balanced, perfectly managed, or perfectly ordered!

When I go to bed on time, I accomplish "less". I can get grumpy if I start thinking about all the things I wanted to get done, bemoaning the fact that I "wasted" those hours asleep!

And on the reverse, when I stayed up way past my bedtime in order to check more things off my lists, I felt grumpy the next morning because I'd only gotten a few hours of sleep the night before!

There's really only one cure for this (besides hiring a nanny, secretary, housekeeper, and lots of other things I can't afford!).

I discovered this little trick about 5 years ago when my first baby was born. (Suddenly, sleep just wasn't the same any more!)

If you want to be cheerful, you must choose to be cheerful (even when you don't feel like it). If you want to have patience, you have to practice waiting quietly and calmly (even when you don't feel like it). If you want to be kind, choose kindness (even when you don't feel like it).

The good news is that this attitude adjustment is infectious! And it will make your days pass so much more pleasantly -- for you and your family.

So today, along with continuing to follow your set bedtime and morning routine, I want to encourage you to try your best to be loving towards your family... even (or especially!) when you want to feel grumpy.

Found Here

Wanted to share this Scripture

My Thoughts for Today

As you will notice here in my blog I have posted a lot of articles from other websites. I am not that great at writing or homemaking yet. So I am posting articles until I get better at all of this. I will start posting pictures and recipes soon :D As well as a detailed description of how to make and use a home management binder. I hope you will enjoy. Please feel free to comment if you have any questions or suggestions.

Simple Woman's Daybook

Simple Woman's Daybook
Outside my window... Are the pretty mountains and beautiful sky

I am thinking...God will provide.

I am thankful for... My hardworking and determined husband. My wonderful boys. My Family. And most of all my Heavenly Father.

From the kitchen... Chicken Tacos was for dinner tonight :D

I am wearing...pajamas :D its sleepy time already

I am reading...articles on biblical womanhood

I am hoping... that I can get myself out of this rut.

I am creating... my blog.

I am hearing... the tv and my baby sleeping

Around the house... all is quiet as everyone is tucked into bed

One of my favorite things...is waking up to my darling family and zebra cakes :D

A few plans for the rest of the week... get caught up with cleaning, get my to do list completed everyday and trust in the Lord whole heartedly.

Here is a picture thought I am sharing with you...

Woman's Impact on the Home

Woman's Impact on the Home
by Rachel Weaver

(Taken from notes of a mother’s meeting given by Helen Leibee)

A woman has a tremendous impact on her home. Her sensitivity and responses can make or break her home. This places a real premium on our attitudes and responses. It puts the responsibility for how we think and act right into our laps. And that is precisely where God wants it to be. We tend to get excited and run out to hunt for another manual to read, another tape to listen to and another methodology to follow. We call someone up on the phone and spend their precious hours and ours, trying to get to the bottom of our problems, when the answer is so simple that it tends to be obscure.

Do we believe the Bible and obey it? If we do and we find our answers in the Word, we rarely need to call someone else for help. Again, the question is, “are we obeying what God has already shown us?”

Our Heavenly Father will not fully bless us unless we follow the direction that He has already given us. Most of us fail, not from lack of knowledge, but from lack of obedience. The Word has a number of basic teachings and we need to use them to bring honor to God and peace to our homes. Let’s take a look at seven basic teachings that can change the atmosphere of your home.

1. You are responsible for your role.
2. The Bible prescribed way for changing your husband is through a submissive and holy walk.
3. God’s way is perfect.
4. Be chaste.
5. Be discreet.
6. Be obedient.
7. Reverence your husband.

Let’s take a deeper look at what some of these commands really mean. Often when we do this we find that Satan has watered down their meanings so that the dictionaries do not accurately portray the Biblical meaning to us.

Let’s take for example: Joy. Joy is mentioned 220 times in the Bible. It is a major doctrine. It is important. The present day Webster Dictionary gives the definition of “a feeling of happiness that comes from success, good fortune, or a sense of well being” as the meaning of joy. How diluted! How can that be? The Bible says we will have joy in tribulation, in imprisonment and in trials. That certainly is not just the dictionaries trite, “feeling of well being.” Joy goes so much deeper than success, good fortune, or a sense of well being. Webster’s 1928 edition says, “It is the indwelling, abiding rest and confidence, a delight of the mind, from the consideration of the present or assured approaching possession of a good, a glorious triumphant state!" What a real definition! What a challenge! So let us look at some words with real meanings. Lets take a look at the first teaching. “You’re only responsible for your role.”

If you really believe that, there will not be a restless undercurrent over the many issues that come up. Perhaps your husband has asked you to see that certain things get accomplished. The task looks too big. How will you ever get everything done? If you look at this correctly your response the next morning will be “God, my husband desires that I would _________________. I need your help to do this sweetly and cheerfully and to show the right attitude to my children.” Then with a joyful heart get the children together and say, “Daddy wants us to_____________. Let’s work real hard to bless our Daddy and get it done.” Do not approach the children with the attitude, “I really had planned to ____________, but daddy wants us to ____________, so we will do what he wants us to.” The last response leaves an altogether different flavor with our children than the first one.

The Biblical way for changing your husband is through a submissive and holy walk. Knowing that only true submissions brings about change in our families will change the way we respond to our family. It will cut out the nagging and whining. And when we stop nagging and whining we will be surprised to see that our children will probably respond to us in a much more positive way. If we could choose to have a new piece of furniture, or a new set of dishes or a whole week without any whining, which would we choose? I am sure that your husband would choose the same thing.

God’s way is perfect
When we are truly settled in the heart that His way is perfect it will eliminate our struggles, doubts and complaining. We need to search the scriptures and seek our husband’s counsel and find out what God wants for us as a family to do. Then when we know what He has asked of us, we need to be obedient. When we trust our Heavenly Father and walk in the Spirit we will be led of the Spirit into a beautiful life of obedience and blessing.

Be chaste
Chaste does not mean that we are virgins, but that we are “free from carnality, and modest.” We are set apart from the world in our thoughts and actions. That alone makes us quieter and calmer. We do not have to keep up with the Jones’ or have a “Good Housekeeping” house. We do not want to draw attention to ourselves but rather glorify God in everything. This simple modesty lets people see us as we really are. It does not make pretenses. It does not expect people to take notice of us or our problems. It completely hides us behind the Cross of Jesus. When we exercise this chaste spirit we have more time for Jesus, and more time for our husbands and children. One mother found that this principle freed her from the frustrating last minute rush of sewing complete matching outfits for her family whenever they were to go on a trip or make a public appearance. She decided that if the clothes that they usually wore were good enough for the folks at home, they would do for the trip too. This chaste choice freed her to pack in a happy, sweet way instead of the tense, frustrated way that had previously characterized their packing.

What a lesson on contentment and modesty. It gives us a calm spirit when we are preparing to exercise our gift of hospitality. Instead of rushing around in a tizzy to get ready and have folks see us as we usually are not, we can prepare sweetly with time to pray for those that we are preparing to serve. This set apartness helps us to put our thoughts on heavenly things. It changes our focus from the carnal and makes us sensitive to the tense, selfish impatient attitudes that we so often carry with us. How it would change our homes if we could realize this. “Seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you.” (Matthew 6: 33)

Be discreet.
To be discreet is to be self-controlled, sober minded and temperate. If we are discreet we are not easily upset and overwhelmed. We are calm and even tempered and it affects our children in the same way. If you see overwhelmed, tense children, there may be an overwhelmed, tense mother behind the scenes. Be moderate in all things. Do not be too worried or too sloppy. Be balanced. We are to be quiet and not too silly. We have a calm, sweet, joyfulness that settles over the house and blesses everyone who comes in contact with us.

Be obedient.
Many of us are obedient to our husband’s direct command, but how many of us really respect his unspoken desires. If you know that your husband really wants you to get your house in order, then do it. Maybe he does not give you a written out goal, or perhaps when you ask him for a goal he does not really give you any satisfaction. But you do know what he wants if you become a student of his and begin to listen carefully when he speaks. Many husbands do not give goals because their wives do not carry out the ones they have already given. When you obediently serve the heart of your husband you will find a peace and a fulfillment that you never had before. And when you fulfill his desires in a eager, joyful way your children will catch the excitement and set about to please you in the same way.

A sister from another state shared with me that the Lord was teaching her to respect the desires and wishes of her husband in everything. She and her daughter had gone material shopping in an effort to make the more modest type of clothes that God was laying on their hearts. The fabric store was having a sale and the material was at bargain prices and after an hour of careful shopping they came home with a number of fabric pieces that they were eager to make into new garments. When she showed them to her husband she saw immediately that he was not completely happy with their choices. She made a decision to take the fabric back the next day and see if they would refund her money.

The choice was a hard one because who would ever think that a fabric store would take back a piece of cut material. But God honored her heart and the clerk very graciously refunded her money. This dear sister had just learned a valuable lesson. She says that she will try to be even more careful as she shops to consider her husbands desires instead of her own impulses and wishes. The sweet spirit that she is receiving by this obedience to God was evident even over the phone, for I have never met her in person. There are so many areas where our sensitivity can bless our husbands and children and result in a more peaceful spirit in our home.

Reverence your husband.
The reverence in this context is a wholesome dread of displeasing our husbands that influences our disposition and attitude through trust. If we have this reverence we will be in a constant attitude of carefulness. Noah Webster lists it as fear, mingled with respect and esteem, producing in us an inclination to his service and an unwillingness to offend him. If we reflect on this Bible teaching we will not do anything that will undermine our husband. What a calm, atmosphere we and our children would have if we would understand and apply this principle. Reverence makes us think of the king’s palace. How would one act in that situation? How would we walk and talk if you were in the presence of a king? We would be very careful to please him! We need to reverence our husband and support him in every way. A consistent obedience in this provides an example to our children that makes them sensitive to reverence us. Jesus says, “If ye love me keep my commandments.” Peace in the home does not come from a manual, charts or new methods, but it comes from obeying and applying the living word of God.

Following is a list for you to meditate on and use to the glory of God.

"The aged women likewise, that they be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.” Titus 2:3-5

Am I A Faithful Wife? (A checklist for you)
# Do I acknowledge my husband as head in all my words, actions and countenance? I Cor. 11:2,9
# Do I see Him as my God appointed head and not go to others for their advice above his? I Cor. 14:34,35
# Do I give him space to teach me spiritual things and remain open for correction?
# Do I take seriously the words, “as unto the Lord” and “in everything?” Eph. 5:22, 23,24
# Do I believe in my heart that he is as important to my family’s direction as Christ is to the church?
# What would I do if Christ called and said that he’d be late coming home to supper at my house? Is that how I respond to my husband?
# Do my actions fit the Lord’s desire? Col. 3:18
# Do I dress the way I want or the way my husband wants?
# Do I manipulate my husband to get my own way or do I truly desire his way?
# Do I become myself with good works? I Tim. 5:9 lists some.
# Am I sober, discreet, chaste, and obedient or do I blaspheme the word of God to others in this area? Titus 2:3&4
# Do I reverence my husband? That is; do I have a wholesome dread of displeasing him that influences my disposition and attitude? Eph. 5:33
# The opposite of reverence is rude or discourteous. Am I rude to him? Am I usually joyful in the home?
# Do I smile often at my husband and the children?
# Do I make my home a peaceful haven as far as possible?
# Do I look at my family as if I am interested in what they are saying?
# Do I compliment, (not flatter) them?
# Do I try to have meal on time and according to my husband’s desires?
# Do I think of my work as drudgery?
# Do I start and end their days peacefully and cheerfully?
# Is the house neat and orderly? Am I a slave to it?
# Is Jesus my all in all?

By Pastor Art Kohl
updated May 2004

Copyright © 2004-96
Permission granted to freely copy.
Scripture verses are from the King James Holy Bible.

This article available in printed form click here for details.

It is absolutely wrong for a man to be feminine.
It is so wrong that it is listed among other behaviors
that tell us a person isn't really saved.

1 Corinthians 6:9-11, "Know ye not that the unrighteous
shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived:
neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor
effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, Nor
thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor
extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God. And such
were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified,
but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by
the Spirit of our God."

If is so wrong for a man to be feminine, isn't it equally
wrong for a woman to be masculine?

We live in a day where some women want to work like a man,
dress like a man, curse like a man, spit like a man, drink
like a man, stink like a man, play like a man, smoke like a
man, chew like a man, fight like a man, boss like a man,
swear like a man, etc. To be like a man is their highest
goal and achievement. The pursuit of masculinity is their
highest calling. Anything that man can do, they want to
do. There are two problems with this:

First: Most of what man does is wrong.

Second: A woman has to stoop and lower herself to come
down to a man's level. She has not achieved, she has
demoted herself.

Because the world has come to this, many ladies are afraid
to be feminine. After all, who wants to be different. It
takes a great deal of courage for a woman today to be all
God wants her to be.

The Bible is the textbook on femininity, not the feminists.
The feminists are really masculinists. Women who wants to be
masculine. Woman who resent being women. Women who want to
be men. If you will look closely at them, the result of their
pursuit is misery. Misery because their whole life is spent
missing God's purpose in life. As a fish out of water or a
bird with a broken wing, they cannot enjoy the intended
purpose that God has made them for, and are too proud to
humble themselves to find it.

Don't be afraid to be feminine, in the Bible sense of the word.
These are the happiest, most fulfilled ladies on earth. Beside
all that, we will be responsible for, and give an account for
what the scriptures teach regarding this responsibility. As we
then look forward to, and prepare to face God at the Judgement
seat of Christ, ladies, consider these 34 characteristics of
Biblical femininity:

1. Virtue Proverbs 31:10, "Who can find a virtuous woman? for
her price is far above rubies." Virtue means to be clean and pure.
To be morally excellent is a good quality.

2. Loyalty Proverbs 31:11-12, "The heart of her husband doth
safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.
She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life."
Loyalty is the opposite of treachery. Jeremiah 3:20, "Surely
as a wife treacherously departeth from her husband, so have
ye dealt treacherously with me, O house of Israel, saith the
LORD." A feminine lady is loyal to her husband, her God, her
church, her children, her Savior, etc.

3. Industry Proverbs 31:13-16, "She seeketh wool, and flax,
and worketh willingly with her hands. She is like the merchants'
ships; she bringeth her food from afar. She riseth also while
it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion
to her maidens. She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with
the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard." Industry is
the opposite of laziness and sloth. Her energy is given to her
household. The word "household" appears four times in Proverbs
31 as the direction of her industry. Many of the other verses
in this chapter speak of her industry. She is not a workaholic
hiding from God, she is industrious for God.

4. Strength Proverbs 31:17, "She girdeth her loins with strength,
and strengtheneth her arms." She is not a weakling. She becomes
stronger and stronger in body, intelligence, emotions,
spirituality, etc.

5. Ministering Proverbs 31:18-20, "She perceiveth that her
merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night. She
layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.
She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth
her hands to the needy." She is not self-serving. The feminine
woman ministers to others. She remembers the poor. She is a
giver of alms.

6. Wisdom Proverbs 31:26a, "She openeth her mouth with
wisdom ...." Wisdom is the ability to use and apply knowledge
rightly. She fills her mind and heart with the word of God, and
then uses it appropriately to every situation she faces in life.

7. Kindness Proverbs 31:26b, "... and in her tongue is the
law of kindness." Feminine women are kind, in word and action.
"Charity is kind," 1 Corinthians 13:4. Thus, they are filled
with Charity.

8. Fear for God Proverbs 31:30 "Favour is deceitful, and beauty
is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised."
Femininity fears God. Ecclesiastes 12:13-14, "Let us hear the
conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments:
for this is the whole duty of man. For God shall bring every
work into judgment, with every secret thing, whether it be good,
or whether it be evil." Feminine women do their duty.

9. Are Praised Proverbs 31:28, "Her children arise up, and call
her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her."
Proverbs 31:30,
"Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that
feareth the LORD, she shall be praised. Give her of the fruit of
her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates." She is
praised by her own husband and by her works. Her works for God
are so obvious, that they cry out in praise of her. Only one
other being in all of the Old Testament is praised, and that
is God!

Now lets leave the Old Testament and look at more
characteristics defining Femininity in the New Testament:

10. Benevolence 1 Corinthians 7:3, "Let the husband render
unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto
the husband." She receives benevolence from her husband, and
also returns benevolence to her husband. Benevolence means
"good will as a conjugal duty; to be well-minded towards;
reconciled with."

11. Submission Ephesians 5:22, "Wives, submit yourselves unto
your own husbands, as unto the Lord." Colossians 3:18, "Wives,
submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the
Lord." With the type of submission that she has to the Lord,
she also directs the same submission to her husband. "Submission"
means "to be subordinate to, to yield under to." The same word
is used in submitting to God in James 4:7 and to government
in 1 Peter 2:13.

12. Reverence Ephesians 5:33, "Nevertheless let every one of
you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the
wife see that she reverence her husband." She is in awe of her
husband. She respects him with fear. This word is usually
translated "to be afraid of, to fear." She has a holy devotion
to him and fears him similar to her fear for God.

Let's look at more characteristics of Biblical Femininity
from the following text:

1 Timothy 2:9-15, "In like manner also, that women adorn
themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and
sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or
costly array; But
(which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.
Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. But I
suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the
man, but to be in silence. For Adam was first formed, then
Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived
was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved
in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and
holiness with sobriety."

13. Modest in dress She hides the form of her body.
Her clothes are long, loose-fitting and cover all of her
nakedness. She does not dress in the "attire of an harlot"
as mentioned in Proverbs 7:10, "And, behold, there met him
a woman with the attire of an harlot, and subtil of heart."

14. Shamefaced She has the ability to blush. Her eyes are
down cast unlike a harlot whose face is bold toward impurity.
(Proverbs 7:13-23)

15. Her Hair is Simple It is long (1 Corinthians 11:15) and
simple. She is not trying to gain the attention of man by her
appearance, but the praise of God.

16. Jewelry and Clothes Don't Mean Much to Her They are nice,
simple and inexpensive.

17. Good Works She is clothed with good works. She is constantly
doing good for her God, her husband, her children, her church,
others, the lost, etc.

18. Learns God's Word in Silence She is not a "place seeker" in
the church, but a humble student of God's word. She learns God's
word and teaches the younger women (Titus 2:4) and her children.
(2 Timothy 1:5; 3:15-16) She doesn't seek to usurp authority over
men when it comes to the public teaching of God's word in the
church. She hears the preaching and teaching ministries in silence.
She asks questions at home. (1 Corinthians 14:35)

19. Faith She continues in faith and in the faith. She trusts
in God and believes in Him.

20. Charity She is a living example of charity as it is defined
in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a, "Charity suffereth long, and is kind;
charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not
easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but
rejoiceth in the truth; Beareth all things, believeth all things,
hopeth all things, endureth all things. Charity never faileth:"

Let's continue to learn more of the characteristics of true
femininity by looking at the text in Titus 2:4-5, "That they
may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands,
to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home,
good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be
not blasphemed."

21. Sober She is intelligent. Being feminine does not mean she
is dumb or a "dizzy broad." She is an intelligent woman. Sober
means to be of a sound mind. She is ever gaining in knowledge.

22. Loves Her Husband There is a fondness in her heart toward
her husband. She gives her life for him.

23. Loves Her Children There is a fondness in her heart toward
her children. She does more than just put up with them. They are
her life. She gives herself for them.

24. Discreet This is the opposite of being sexy. She does not
carry herself about in a "sexy" way. She is modest in her
dress and behavior.

25. Chaste She is sexually pure. She keeps herself for her
husband and only unto him when married. She does not commit
adultery or fornication.

26. Keeper at Home She is not a busybody. She loves to stay
home and stays home. Home is where her heart is. She does not
work out in the world unless she has no husband to care for
her or he can't. If she is business-minded, she works
out of her home.

27. Good Feminine women are good women. Good is the
opposite of bad or evil. She is not bad in character.
She does not do evil in practice.

28. Obedience She is obedient to her husband. Her desire
is unto him (Genesis 3:16). He is the head of the family
(1 Corinthians 11:3). Anything with two heads is a monster.
She allows him to lead.

Our final text on feminine characteristics is found in
1 Peter 3:1-6, "Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to
your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also
may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting
the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not
corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which
is in the sight of God of great price. For after this manner
in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned
themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: Even
as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye
are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement."

29. Subjection She is subject to her own husband. This word
is a military term. It speaks of rank. According to
1 Corinthians 11:3, God has the highest rank, then Christ is
under Him, then the husband is under Christ, then the wife is
under her husband, then last the children are under the parents.
The feminine woman doesn't want to be the General.

30. Fears Properly She has a proper fear for the authorities
over her. A reverential and holy respect. She is not proud,
rebellious or stubborn toward Divine leadership, family
leadership or spiritual leadership.

31. Desire Feminine women have a desire toward their husbands.
He is the hidden man of her heart. She is not a "looker".
She is satisfied with the husband she has. Her desire is
unto him. (Genesis 3:16)

32. Meek Spirited Meekness is the inward strength to
depend on God to fight our battles, meet our needs, take
care of situations, change people, etc. without taking things
into our own hands. Meekness is not weakness, it is
strength. The inward strength to truly let go and let God.

33. Quiet Spirited She is calm. She rules her emotions
and will very well. Proverbs 25:28, "He that hath no rule
over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down,
and without walls." She is able to sit still and wait on God.
She lets patience have her perfect work in her life and
situations, James 1:4, "But let patience have her perfect work,
that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing." She
is not noisy and demanding.

34. Fearless She is not afraid with any amazement. Nothing
amazes her. She is mentally and spiritually prepared
for anything. Some things may come up unexpectedly, but she
doesn't go to pieces. She doesn't lose her head. She doesn't
become an emotional basket case. True feminine women are
soft but strong. They have grace and beauty. They mix blue
denim with lace. Don't be afraid to be feminine.

Ladies, inventory your feminine character by the Word of God.
Only let the Bible be your guide in this matter, not the ways
of the women of the world. The Bible will be your judge someday,
not them. Notice John 12:47-48 "And if any man hear my words,
and believe not, I judge him not: for I came not to judge the
world, but to save the world. He that rejecteth me, and receiveth
not my words, hath one that judgeth him: the word that I have
spoken, the same shall judge him in the last day."

Pray for the help of the Holy Spirit to be the lady God
wants you to be. Ask for the grace of God to help you in
your time of need, Hebrews 4:16. God's grace will enable
you in every good work, including these 34.

Here's His promise:

2 Corinthians 9:8, "And God is able to make all grace
abound toward you; that ye, always having all sufficiency
in all things, may abound to every good work."

Do not try this on your own, ask for the help of the
Holy Spirit and the Grace of God. Be feminine and be
eternally rewarded!

Copyright © 2004-96
Permission granted to freely copy.
Scripture verses are from the King James Holy Bible.

Another Friday

Today is Friday and my weekly grocery day. This week we will be eating light and cheap. We have some meals that didnt get fixed last week from me being sick so here is what our dinners look like for this week.
-Chicken tacos
-Pork chops, oven potatoes, greens or corn
-Chilli dogs and tator tots
-Hot ham and cheese sandwiches
-Bratwurst and baked beans
-Oven Pizzas
-Reuben Sandwiches
Also I make a batch of muffins every week for hubby to take to work for breakfast. I think this week is blueberry muffins. :) I will post pictures of the muffins this weekend when I get them finished. Happy shopping!